Day 375 CD 70

Felt rotten today (too much wine last night, a broken sleep) - ate accordingly

Day 374 CD 69: Exercise day

Wow - just noticed that I have been blogging on my ups and downs with Intuitive Eating for over a year now.

I guess in some ways that is a bit sad, as I don't feel like I really have made any progress.

I still eat more than I should most of the time
I still binge on occasion
I still weigh more than I'd like
I still feel out of control with food
I still sometimes eat in secret

On the other hand...

I do have days when I eat intuitively and have small victories of eating intuitively and making the right choices
I did show that I could give up sugar for a whole month
I am running/walking and bike riding, and I have taken up karate
I am regularly thinking about eating nuts and fruit as snacks, and pack them in my lunch

So I guess in some ways this *IS* progress... it just feels a long way from the way I want to feel.. free from feeling controlled by food and happy with the way I feel

Day 373 CD 68

Been out of action for a few days, away from a computer, which was quite a nice change... actually if the truth be told there was a computer I could use, but it was a mac and I couldn't for the life of me figure out how to turn it on!!!!! :-)

On the eating front I did well when I was distracted (it was a busy weekend), but did eat through the best part of a king size bar of chocolate in the space of less than a day! I didn't get out for any runs either.

Had another "interesting" day at work today, which is stressing me a bit - but hoping just to go with the flow.....

Day 368 CD 63: A run in the sun

It was an absolutely stunning day here today (although is supposed to get down to a chilly 2 degrees tonight - brrr!!!)

I went for a lovely run/walk along the beach today. (My only real mini victory today)

Day 367 CD 62

Ho hum day today - a minor victory in that I halfed the chocolate bar that I bought from the snackbox with my co-worker (thus avoiding eating it all myself!).

I didn't make it for a run at lunchtime, as i had these weird stomach cramps. They lasted about an hour, but went away in the end.

Very chilly here tonight - hopefully another fine day tomorrow.

Day 366 CD 61: Eat and eat and eat

It was a beautifully sunny but chilly day today. For some reason I just wanted to eat and eat and eat.... I don't know why....

But anyway, some small victories:
- walk at lunchtime when tempted to buy lollies
- ride bike home instead of getting a lift
- karate

Day 365 CD 60

I have started to log my "mini victories". Today I had a few including:
- going to the snack box for a cookie, buying liquorice instead, and then putting it in my drawer and eating an apple instead (ate it later in the afternoon)
- consciously taking a smaller portion for dinner and my evening snacks
- going for a run at lunchtime.

I am going to work on increasing my mini victories this next 30 days.

If I can average 3 mini victories each day this week, as well as have 5+ fruit and vege, by next Monday, I will buy myself some nice Living Nature products.

Day 364 CD 59

I did moderately today. Looking back at my food diary I can see that I am not eating much fruit during the day, but eating lots of refined food. That has been happening a lot lately.

At least it was a gorgeous sunny day here today. I got out with the kids this morning to the park, and then later this afternoon for a walk along the beach to the rock pools. That was fun!

I'm off to do some weights - haven't done any for a few days.

I feel a need for some goal setting coming on - for health/eating/finances/marriage/exercise....

Day 363 CD 58

I feel like I was a little more on track and intuitive today. I still have a long way to go, but I made some conscious choices today (like going for a run, stopping when I wasn't enjoying the apple turnover).

I think I will go sugar free for 30 days again on Monday. I will talk to hubby about it to see what he thinks. I'm not sure if this latest binge few weeks was caused by the "no sugar" deprivation mentality... anyone out there reading - tell me what you think!

Day 360 CD 54: Karate!

Last night I went to a trial karate class. It was actually quite fun and I think I will take it up once or twice a week.

I have been eating like a crazy woman lately. I got through my first bar of chocolate (plus other stuff) in two days....

I finished the Beyond Chocolate book - now just need to put it into practice - deciding what to focus on first.

Day 359 CD 53: A beautiful monday

Gorgeous weather here today.

I bought 3 king size bars of whittakers creamy milk chocolate tonight, as part of my Beyond Chocolate beginnings. I haven't listened to my hunger today, although I did stop for 60 seconds at one point....

Wednesday is my focus renewal day. Tomorrow I will prepare.

Day 358 CD 52

After a crazy weekend of 2 year old birthday/party, visitors and too much wine, I got an hour or so this afternoon to read my Beyond Chocolate book. So far so good, it seems fairly similar to my other IE books (HUGS, IE, Rules of Normal Eating).

Two things I have picked up on are:
- they said that there will be times when you stop yourself before eating, realise that you are not hungry and that you are eating for emotional reasons, but you will still eat - and that is ok, since we aren't perfect
- often books say "distract yourself, call a friend, go for a walk" but that is not easy to do, they suggested at first to just even stop yourself for 60 seonds to see "where you are at"

I will go and read some more now.

p.s. managed to get out for a run with my sister, and didn't do too badly

Day 355 CD 49

Did ok today until I came to work from home this afternoon. I was stressing about work and worrying about some other things, and I raided the party treats from the pantry....

It's like I put my logical conscious brain away, and let the eating monster inside take over....

I ordered a second hand book called Beyond Chocolate. I think it is basically intuitive eating, but the UK version.... will see how that goes when I get it. I don't want to start over yet again though....

Day 354 CD 48: More crazy eating

Crazy eating days continue...

Day 350 CD 44: After days of bingeing, some light

I've had a bit of a binge fest this week. Gone crazy over sugar and chocolate.

But today wasn't so bad (despite being an awful wet cold dreary day). I didn't munch out, and I ate reasonable portions. I also haven't spend the evening raiding the pantry like I usually do. My stomach currently feels at about a 4, which is much better than going to be on an 8!!!

Aim for tomorrow, meal by meal, think.